The event was from 2pm to 6pm. So I made sure to get there at least 30 minutes before then. Big mistake. I should have gotten there MAYBE 1 hour or 2 beforehand. This event was sold out! I couldn't believe how many women were there! I would say AT LEAST 700 to 1000 people. I had to park about 2 blocks away then WALK back to the building and wait in line to get in. I must say what I saw as I walking to get in the line, while waiting in line and when I finally got in the building were so many beautiful women color. So many women there had there hair out and proud in its natural state. Other women looked just as gorgeous with their relaxed styles and weaves in place. There wasn't any finger pointing which I definitely liked, yet I will say I kept my hat on the whole time;)
There were about 8 people on the panel (if I recall) with the main attraction being the co-founders (two African-Asian american sisters) of a hair line called Ms. Jessie's. They were very knowledgeable about hair especially since they are stylists who own their own salon and shop in New York. Yet I will say the person that really held my attention was Dr. Nina Ellise-Hervy better know as BeautifulBrwnBabyDol on the internet. She is also from Saint Louis, MO but currently resides in Texas in a city (Nacogdoches) I still after 5 tries, am not sure if I am saying it correctly. She talked about her life and her struggles. With school (obtained her Ph.D), her weight (lost 100 pounds) and her hair. She said something to me that really got to me. She said there are people in your life that are gonna have issues with you, especially when you change your appearance. I'm not gonna be naive and think there won't be people out there who will have doubts and think I have lost my mind if I do decide to go through with this. Yet she says you have to deal with them just the way you dealt with your hair. Unhealthy ends and cut em off.
I must say what I learned about hair especially my own hair was really an eye opener. I had been thinking for a while ever since some time last year about just saying "phuck it" and take it off. Yet I wasn't sure, hell I'm still nervous just thinking about. About a month ago my beautician had taken about 4 inches off, so I currently am sporting a bob because of hair damage. Yet this week I have a hair appointment which is "scheduled" for a relaxer.
I started thinking why did I want to cut my hair. I've always liked my hair long especially being able to put up or down in different styles. Yet deep down I've always known I used my hair as a curtain in a way to hide my face. I've never really been comfortable about how I looked. I remember asking someone what they they thought if I cut my hair off and they looked at me crazy. They said why would you do that? Your hair is beautiful and anyway your head is too big for that. I just looked away and thought...wow.
Last year I went without a relaxer for about 3 months. I paid for it to when I did eventually go see my beautician with all the crazy combing I endured but I must say what I saw at the roots of my hair during those 3 months fascinated me. There were times I was standing in front of my mirror playing with my kinks (aka curls) and was amazed at how springy they were! I was like wow, this is really interesting.
I know it will be a big step if I decide to go through it. Yet regardless of what I decide to do I know the main thing is WHATEVER I decide to do will be my decision, not anyone else's. It's funny as I wrap up this post two songs came to me from India Arie. I realized I am not my hair. It's just apart of me. I am so much more than that. Strength, Courage, & Wisdom.
